FL Youth Ranch !!!

Hey, my loyal bloggers… it has been a while since I have had the privilege of blogging. Today I come to you with new updates and I will share with you all a new organization I have discovered.

So, let’s begin… last week I was honored to have been invited to the annual thanksgiving banquet for the Florida Sheriffs Youth Ranch organization in Safety Harbor. I have never been in this part of the Tampa Bay area before, so the notion of just getting to visit the area was exciting in it of itself- add free food and man it’s a party! Major Lol. I was invited by no other than a top employee of the association, so I also got an Uber tour when we arrived at the camp.

They have a full outdoors basketball court and playground areas for the kids/youth who reside there with the caregivers. There are several homes in this camp, each home hosts up to 10 kids, with a set of caregivers (fulfilling the role of mother and father). They have other buildings assigned for the chapel and dinning area. It truly is a nice campus overall.

As soon as we entered the dinning hall, I was amazed on how nice the décor looked. Everything was neatly set up with fancy colored napkins and several silverwares (which to be honest I was a little intimidated by). I was introduced to several of the fellow members of this organization and I had the privilege of sitting next to a Hillsborough deputy (which was my eye candy of the night) shhhh don’t tell him. Hahhahaha. Anyways back to the important things, this banquet was to recognize the people who volunteer, donate, and work alongside the Florida Sheriffs Youth Ranch. The main focus of this entity is to bring about change in the course of young people’s life aka the kids/youth. These kids are brought in voluntarily by their family members or through the foster system in some cases as this is a private organization that seeks to straighten the path of kids and teens coming from physical/verbal abused homes.  

After we had the thanksgiving meal, some of the residents came up to the front to give a small shout out of gratitude to the audience and association. I was genuinely touched by their words and how they expressed that the Florida Sheriffs Youth Ranch was a place they could call home.

I was once a foster kid myself, so I know exactly what it feels to be separated from your parents and have to live with strangers for a whole year. I have a blog post detailing my foster home experience and my point of view on the current foster home system. I want more now than ever to be an advocate for this life changing organization, that has had an impact in the lives of over 150,000 kids since the 1950s. I hope to get the opportunity of mentoring these young minds and become a sponsor myself.

Just between me and my blog readers: I was looking forward to sharing my story at the banquet, but I guess it might have taken the focus away from the kids if I shared my inspiring story. So, I will continue to wait eagerly for the next opportunity to share my story publicly at another event.

I can’t wait to be at a place in my life where I am being booked for presentations!!! Yes, I am looking forward to actually becoming an official motivational speaker. Well, hope you enjoyed one more blog from no other than me aka Ana Gonzalez aka beautifulSoul aka amilikey trade mark hashtag!!! Major Lol.

Xoxoxoxo,

Ana 😊   

Domestic Violence

     Make-up helps cover some bruises but believe me nothing covers up the pain of being the victim of verbal and physical abuse. I had a great childhood and most people would disagree with me because of my accident at age three; however, I was the one living my childhood and I enjoyed every part of it. Yes, there was physical pain from surgeries and treatments, but apart from that I was loved and taken good care of as a child. I had lots of barbies and girl toys and I had lots of play-time.

    I was a very innocent child back in the day and with time I matured and my innocence washed away layers by layers. I remember crying with my mom as she sobbed from her wounds that my FATHER biological father gave her. I didn't understand the concept of domestic violence at that time and moment, but I did my best to comfort her and try to protect her as well. I came to realize the horror of what my father did to my mom around the age of 9-ish definitely when I was 11 years old I heard the stories in full detail and was perplexed to discover my father had the audacity to treat my mother that way for no reason.

    My father is a chronic alcoholic due to my grandfather's own alcoholism that he imposed and passed down on to him. Every time my father became drunk out of his ass he became extremely aggressive and took it out on my mother almost on a every other day basis. He left bruises on her face and body each and every time. He could care less if me and my sister were crying in the crib from the screams of the physical battery going on. My mother suffered this abuse for about 8 consecutive years, because she felt she had no other options with no education and no family to rely on for help. My father not only beat her up physically but verbally he made her think she was a piece of shit by calling her derogatory names all the time.

    It breaks my heart to know the truth of what happened when I was helpless to help and protect my angel. She did absolutely nothing to deserve any of this domestic violence; my mother was always a great housewife - taking care of the household and her children. On top of the domestic violence, my father boosted on his affairs and the other women he had been with. He was never faithful or a good partner, and when my accident happened he only sought out for his best interest to get a free ride off of me to come to the American Dream. He never visited me at the hospital while I was in treatment and never made himself available to take care of me, but when the doors to Shriners Hospital for Children opened up he jumped in front of the line.

     All in all, domestic violence is an experience no one should have to face and people may underestimate the power of words but they do impact someone's life. I too have experienced both in my lifetime and from a relative as well. I already am a survivor of burns, but to have to add a survivor of domestic violence too is not something I want to admit to. I will always be an advocate for every cause I have experienced and believe in.

    Well, till the next blog I wish every single one of you a wonderful week and success in all that you do honestly. Believe in your hidden talents and know you're NOT a mistake and there is a plan and purpose just for you. Smile as much as you can and remember there is always someone who has it worse than you and I, so be grateful for whatever you have and be brave.

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,

Ana :)

Family Planning

      I love to think about the future, because it makes me happy. I think about it all, how I will be in 5 years from now, and I want to achieve as much of it as possible. I have thought about how many kids I want to have since I was in middle school. I want to be a mother to four beautiful children. I don't know how many I can pop out of my body (not literally but you know what I mean) but I also want to adopt. I even hope to be able to be a foster parent.

       I have a rational reason to why I want four kids. A single child is bound to be a spoiled brat; 2 kids if they're the opposite sex like a sister and a brother will not have that sister or brother to really bond with about girls or boys things; 3 kids will mean either the brother or sister will not have another brother or sister to have that same sex bond; so 4 hopefully 2 girls and 2 boys will leave each siblings with a same sex partner that they can relate to on all levels.

     My kids will have an awesome mommy, (aka me) one that will be real about everything with them. I will always let them know about drugs, sex, and crime (I do have a clean criminal record fyi). I want my kids to be honest to me about everything even if I don't approve or it makes me sad. If they can't trust me and come to me 1st then I feel like I am not the mother they needed. I wish I could go to my mom for everything, but I know I can't for obvious reasons. I know she did her best in life and it's not her fault she couldn't help me in the educational world, like with my academic choices.

        I know had my mom been more open and educated about certain things, I would have made better choices and perhaps avoided making so many mistakes. I want to be my children's mother and true friend. I will never hide my past from them and I will tell them exactly how I ended up in the wrong situations as to help them stay clear of those moments themselves. I want me and my future husband to guide them and allow them to still make their own mistakes knowing we did what we could to assist them in their time of need. I have a clear vision of the type of wife and mother I want to be in the near future.

   I want to adopt a baby, one that will be similar to my kids so they don't feel like an obvious outsider. I probably would adopt an Asian baby or a light skin black baby. Adoption is a wonderful thing as it enables someone without a family to be a part of someone's life. I was a previous foster kid for a year, so I completely understand the feeling of being separated from their parents, and now times that by ten and have your own parents not want you or somehow you loose them.

     Well, I have more family planning. To be continued ...


Xoxoxoxoxo,


Ana  :)

Guest Blogging !!!

View Me

Hello there Everyone!!!

I am also a guest blogger is anyone is interested in me writing a few articles posts for your personal blog. Do not be hesitant to ask me and I will be more than happy to spit some good content out for you. I may be only 28 years of age, but in these years I have acquired a lot of experiences and I can share enlightenment with everyone.

All types of topics, as you know I am not shy to talk about the birds and the bees or drug and alcohol too. I have wisdom to share as well. So go ahead and pour it on me and contact me if you are interested in my content for your blog.

As proof of my guest blogging, please visit this link and see the blogging I have done for my friend in the Asia continent.

http://www.whatevergracemeans.com/2018/03/my-mental-crisis.html


Thanks again guys!!!

CLICK me please

xoxoxoxoxo,

Ana :)

Babysitting/ Babysitter

     Oh baby baby, how was I suppose to know .... hit me baby one more time. Oh oops, my bad not that kind of baby. Major Lol. I meant like an infant baby. I had the privilege to be raise by my angel aka mommy till I was school age. I did got to daycare for a couple of weeks once, but my mom ended up taking care of me again. I also, went to after school program - that's like a babysitter- during my first years in elementary school. 

      My dad took care of me for about 2 years all on his own. He literally paid for like maybe 6 different babysitter for me and in the end he just gave up and left me at home after he picked me up from school. Out of those different babysitters, I did have my favs!!! For example, this one lady was I believe Colombian as well, she would cook me real breakfast with everything: toasted buttered bread, hot chocolate, eggs, and maybe ham or bacon. She was a great cook, and she never missed a meal. I was eating so good, but she charged like $100.00 per three days something like that and my dad was too cheap to pay up. So she only babysat me for like a week. 

    I had this one younger babysitter who offered me toasted bread with melted butter or cheese and ever since I tried it - I would only ask her for that same food. She would always ask, " Are you sure that's all you want?" and I would always say, " Yes" but in reality as a 8 year old I didn't know what else to ask for. She also was a short lived time. One time, I was just staying at his job (my dad's is a mechanic) and there was no real office to stay in except a tiny room. So I just stayed in my dad's car with the windows up and the air was off. There was a construction going on in the front of the car shop and they reported me inside the car. The cops knocked on my window and I was so freaked out. I was just coloring my coloring books in the back seat. 

    After that day my father never let me stay in the car. I was so scared, because I didn't understand what was going on and my English wasn't that great either. Apart from that incident, I was always safe with the people that babysat me. 

    On the other hand, I have babysat for other people as well. I was my brothers babysitter and I was only eight years old. I was the best babysitter too. I helped my mom babysit this beautiful little girl and we still talk about her till this day. She is always in our thoughts and we miss her dearly. I wish deep down, somehow I still could babysit but school and work limits my time. Not to mention my volunteering events I attend often. 

    Overall, I have plenty of babysitting experience both as a the babysitter and the baby being watched Lol. Hope you enjoyed yet another piece of my life's journey. I will make a commitment to set a due date for my book or else this is never gonna get done. 

Love y'all, 

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Ana :)

Prizes!!!

   Hola my peeps!!! 

  I want to talk and share a little bit more of my amazing life. I have been a student since I was 5 years old, and at the age of 28 - I am still a student (college student). 

   Ironically, I remember I hated school as a kid because I was bullied by the kids since I was a burn survivor and English was my second language, so academics was a real struggle for me. After 2nd grade, I had a 360 degree change in attitude and perception of school. My angel aka my mommy, grew up in the rural area with barely any education; therefore, she was obligated to become a housekeeper since she was only 12 years old. Her whole life depended on people allowing her to be their stay at home maid. 

    My angel instilled in me and my siblings, that education was the only way out of poverty and out of living a miserable lifestyle. A life filled with abuse and humiliation by the employers and men she dated. So, as I began to mature around the age of 9 I realized she was absolutely right, and after I began to discover all the suffering she had been through in her life: I felt the obligation of doing better than she did and becoming an A student was my new motto. 

    I won my first academic award at the age of 9 or 10 when I was selected as the best student of the year for my third grade class back in Colombia. (Which really speaks volumes, because unlike the American mediocrity praising system - I had to actually work my butt off to be excellent.) It was amazing to hear my name called out to receive the certificate for best student of the year. I went on to come back to the states as a 4th grader in Yates Elementary. I was placed in ESOL class for about 2 months to regain my English skills. Once 5th grade started, I was back on tract and I won several certificates of excellency for various subjects. 

    My very 1st trophy was awarded in middle school. I was unaware that there was an award ceremony held every year for each grade. I was provided with an invitation and I felt like I was attending the Grammy awards on the red carpet or something along those lines. I thought surely I will only receive a diploma. To my amazement, I was awarded the Science Trophy for Best Science Student for all of my 6th grade team ( a class of about 300). I was so happy and grateful to have won something for the very 1st time that came in the shape of a trophy. I wore a pink dress and had braces on too. I'll upload the picture later on. 

     To make my middle school experience even that much more exciting: after having been upgraded from 7th grade to 8th grade within the same year I was invited to the awards ceremony for the 2nd time. I won 2 prizes that year: a certificate for best 5th period math student and I was nominated to the Benito Cup award that recognized the best student out of all the 8th graders and received a medal. 

    Overall, I have had a great career in my academia since I made the decision to make a difference in my life and for my mom. I wanted to make her proud and show her all her sacrifices were not made in vain for me and my siblings. Fast-forwarding to today, I hold a Bachelor of Arts in Geography from USF with a membership to an honor society. I already know the moment I graduated from High School with Honors - my mother was very proud of me and when I became a professional too. Education is the key to success in my eyes and it has been the driving force for me to live a happy and fulfilling life. There are a lot more details I can elaborate on in relation to my academic achievements, but I will relay those in  my upcoming autobiography. 

Till next time chao chao,

xoxoxoxoxoxo, 


Ana :)

Ke-Ke Challenge !!!!

       Challenge this Keke, what is round without a center and no base and it shines? .... it's okay take your precious time.... okay that's good enough, the answer is .... drum roll  please...... a RING ... 

Yes, a ring is round without a base or a center and it shines if it is gold or silver. It's an old guessing question my mommy once asked me and I was like whatttt. She phrased it differently in Spanish but still. 

     Anyways, about the real challenge I have to say it it blank STUPID & dangerous people getting out of the cars to start dancing to that song. They act like it's the chiit but it's not at all. I would never join this challenge or most challenges to be honest, because they are lame as hell. I mean there is so much to be done in this world that is productive and we actually need, yet people choose to waste their time trying to go viral. It's so sad what social media has done to some people. But not me honey, I stay in my lane with my name in the right place and no where in sight okay. 

       I will be a social media babe, but it will not be due to some game. I have true purpose to live for and true motives to strive for, so don't be alarmed when my name pop up in your news feeds. I blog what is in my heart and realize there have been so many people before you to come and make a mess in my aorta. My keep bleeding love in a way, but I will take a transfusion from the best and His name is Jesus. He will restore all that I have done wrong inside of my heart. No one can stop me from His will and His plan. I may be all alone in terms of my status; however, at least I know where I am going and I will never settle for less even if it means more stress. 

        I once was told that I have a gift of words, do not confuse my single love song for your broken-heart. I say what I mean and I tell it straight up with no sugar coating because I am not a splenda to make it taste sweet. My mind plays no games when it comes to my passion, and you can leave the old fashions for your grammy or papi, because honey I am too much for all of these foolishness called KeKe challenge. 

Drop the mic !!!

Ana in the house y'all !!!!



I love me. Major Lol. 

xoxoxoxoxo,


Ana :) 


KEKE me Lol    

Foster Care

   I can say that I have been adopted by the Puerto Rican culture since I was 11 years old. My foster parents were from Puerto Rico and I stayed with them for a whole year. 

    They were nice people who taught me a lot about Puerto Ricans and the foster system. There were 3 other kids staying at the same home, so we had a full-house. I was fortunate enough to be able to stay alongside my brother. There was a teenage girl who also lived there and became a sister to me. She made my stay there ten times better- although she was going through her immature and wild years she was very helpful and was a big sister to me. 

    I visited my angel aka my mommy every two weeks in the beginning and later on it was increased to once every week for 2 hours. The first few visits were monitored and slowly progressed from one hour to two hours without direct supervision. The hardest part was watching my baby brother who was only three years old start crying when the visit was over. 

    The lady taking care of us was a great cook, but she wasn't very loving and the kids called her grama. My brother had real hearing problems and it wasn't diagnosed at the time so the lady yelled at him a lot and wasn't very considerate of the situation we personally were facing. I definitely saw some discrepancies in their way of care towards the children. They used their money unwisely by saving money on the food they provided for the kids. For example, instead of buying fresh fruits and vegetables, she would buy boxes of macaroni and cheese and dry soups to make for them on a weekly basis. The kids were malnourished from their day to day meals. The food they were given were 90% all processed and in small amounts. 

    They spent about $300.00 in just meats of which the kids only got maybe a piece or two a week when they ate it daily. Also, they were both somewhat chain smokers and smoked inside and outside the house. When the summer time came she would not bathe the kids on a basis that they were already getting wet outside in the plastic kids pool she filled up every day. The kids had fun splashing but they still needed a real bath, and she skipped that daily care quite a few times. 

    Overall, it was an experience I would never want to repeat and it's sad to see people take care of kids in need only for the money. I have always wanted to adopt a child, but after that foster care living arrangement I want to adopt that much more and become a foster parent myself. 

Thank you for joining me along in this journey of life via social media. 

Free Participation 

  

CP Presentation - By Ana Gonzalez

Dating???

     Swipe left, swipe right, how many likes do I have? How many requests do I have? All these questions are the typical ones popping up when you're an online dating site. I started online dating when I was 24 years old, but I started chatting with strangers online when I was 19. I admit the excitement of the popularity gets to you, but in the end it leaves you brokenhearted. 

       I was on Tagged, Match.com, Tinder, MeetMe, KIK, OKCupid, Badoo, POF, and maybe a few more which I can't recall at the moment. I regret it all from start to end. All the men I spoke to via messages was just a utter disappointment. They were all there seeking only free samples and desserts. I caved in with the 1st one promising me the boyfriend experience- it ended after a month. They always lured me in with compliments and fake promises about wanting to get serious with me and discussing marriage and such. I was so naive and stupid, looking back on it I wish I could have slapped myself in the face and said, " what in the hell are you thinking." 

        I sexted them all with dirty conversations that I am now ashamed of and realize it only provoked them more to treat me as a slut. I was so desperate to feel love by a man and to be loved that I lowered my standards and disregarded my morals. To this day, I am still perplexed by the phenomenon that is online dating versus real life interaction: online I was this super sexy and desirable babe everyone liked and loved - yet in real life no man ever approaches me to even ask me for my number. It makes no sense to be so alluring online, but in person the minute they see me they could care less for me. 

       I grow more and more sure that I wasn't meant for marriage or to be in a relationship. I know my personal attempts were all flawed by seeking in the wrong places. Yet, I can't get over the fact that I have been in college for almost ten years now; and I have yet to met a man that would be interested in me at all. I am a social person in the sense of going places and meeting new people, but none of those places or interactions have led to anything. It's not like I haven't been surrounded with educated people who have better standards than those online - but nothing has changed for me. No man whether smart or handsome wants me as a partner. 

         I have had so many disillusions at this point that I have little to no hope in ever having a partner in crime. So, all in all online dating is just a another avenue for getting laid without having to pay for it and not getting legally in trouble for it either. My best advice is to be real to yourself, and don't attempt to make a connection with someone you can't even see in person. Realize time is precious and you shouldn't be investing it on strangers who see you as an object. 


Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,



ANA :) 

    

Divorced Parenthood

         I knew the minute it took place, it wasn't gonna last. It may seem wrong in my part to automatically assume my parents marriage would fail, but I knew them. It happened in my birthday month & week I think, so this made it even worse to deal with because they said it was a birthday present - worst present ever. I was only 6 or 7 years old when my parents got married, and I didn't want them to get married because I knew my father didn't love my mother. 
    
          After about three years of failed marriage, my father filed for divorce while my mother was living in Colombia and he was residing in the states - they got married in Galveston, Texas. My mother was taken back and she was extremely mad that he didn't even consult her about it. She signed it right away and knew it was the right choice. I now look back, and realize my brother wasn't even part of the divorce papers because my father hadn't acknowledged him as his own son. 

           I never had the family experience- where their was no father figure, but a male provider. My mother has been more of a father-figure to me and anyone else. I basically lost the support of my father the moment I left Colombia at age 11. He stopped supporting me financially and also forgot I too needed a father in my life. He had the audacity to make me feel guilty for not dropping my whole life here in the states to return to Colombia to take care of him full-time. 

          As a child of divorced parents at age 9, I can say with absolute confidence that they made the right choice. I have seen so many parents that remain married to keep the family together. Yet, how can they say they're together when there is verbal abuse and so much distance between each other? I prefer parents be divorced and avoid the pain of seeing their failed marriage continue to cause damage to their kids. You can always be a mother or a father to your children without the need to remain in a failed marriage. 

          I pray I never have to experience this in my lifetime with my children. I don't want them to have to experience the separation of parents and I also hope my marriage remains healthy throughout the years till death do us part. Divorce is never easy; however, in most cases it is the right choice to make for the good of all. 


Till next time my beloved bloggers,


Xoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxo


ANA :)



Free Promo !!!!!!  
      

Under the Knife

    Hola peeps !!! 

   I know you know there is only one way under the knife and that's through anesthesia. Correct!! ding ding 

   I have had over 60 surgeries in my lifetime and probably will acquire more as I do need a little skin relief. Plus, if I am fortunate to become a mother I might need a C-section too. I want to give  brief glimpse into my own personal experience. 

    I was usually admitted 8 days before surgery and had a hospital vacay back in the good old days when Shriners allowed for such things. I would have to bathe in the iodine red chemical that came in the form of a sponge and not allowed to consume food pass 12 a.m. 

      I was given some sleeping medicine even before the actual anesthesia to drowse me up I guess. Afterwards, once inside the OR (operating room) they put on all the cords and cables to monitor my vital signs. Then they administer the IV and finally put me under anesthesia by putting it in the IV and placing a mask over my mouth and nose. The nurse always said just count to ten and you'll be asleep. Please I barely made it to 3 and I was knocked out. 

    When I was waking up from anesthesia in the recovery room, I would be so damn thirsty and start to feel the open cuts they made in me in surgery. I would look around and try to see where the bandages were placed. Sometimes I would be like woah what just happened: for instance, one time I was operated on my knee and had a cast on all throughout my leg and I was freaking out a little bit. I was like damn it was just a small cut on the side why is my whole leg covered up. I later learned and understood it was to ensure I didn't attempt or try to bend or move my knee, so the cast made out of Velcro and wires kept it flat. 

    I was out of school for 3 months that time because I had had muscle dormant affect (not a medical true description but that's how I put it) which meant my knee muscle had been out of use for so long my knee literally would not bend so therefore I couldn't walk properly again. I had a lot of massages by my angel my mommy to get it to work again. Even when I returned to school I was given a key to the elevator because I couldn't walk up the stairs for like a week. 

    That same day of surgery, I would end up throwing up like crazy for a couple hours (it was my least favorite part of having a surgery). I complained and was given medicine before surgery to help with it but it only prolonged the wait but never eliminated it from happening. Anyways, I was given lots of morphine to control the pain after surgery and was also placed on antibiotics after every surgery to avoid infection from occurring. 

    I have really detailed unique stories on my list of surgeries, but I will leave those to my future #1 New York's Best Selling Book!!!! Yes, I am still working on my autobiography and it will be a hit. 

Love ya'll 


Xoxoxoxooxoxo, 


Ana :) 

Burn Care 101

   Bonjour mon amies!!!! 

   I am a burn survivor of over 25 years and I love being able to be an advocate for the voiceless. I understand what it means to be a trauma patient and to be hospitalized for weeks on end. I have been in the OR more times than I can remember and been through physical therapy, outpatient clinics, inpatient consultations, etc. Throughout the years I have acquired knowledge on burn care. 

      Many people take one glance my way and automatically give me the pitiful look. I hate it more than words could express. I understand my complexion is the absolute opposite from the norm. 

• "In 2004, nearly 11 million people worldwide were burned severely enough to require
•  medical attention" - from the website : http://www.who.int/en/news-room
• /fact-sheets/detail/burns

6.4 billion people were alive in 2004, if we average of the percentage it is estimated to 0.17% of the population were actually burnt that year worldwide. It was less than a percent of the global population. Which comes to the conclusion that we (burn survivors) are rare to society; hence the discrimination and indifference towards us. 

     As a burn survivor, your life forever changes in every single aspect, and you have to live by certain precautions. 

1.  Stay out of the sun 
2.  Keep lubricated 24/7 
3. Avoid overheating - because you no longer have the sweat glands available to cool your body down as usual
4. Avoid staying in the pool for too long - chlorine causes damage & irritation 
5. Avoid temperatures that are too hot or too cold - you no longer have the layers of skin to protect you from the heat or cold & the burns turn red and start to hurt 
6. BE careful to not fall down or hit your burn skin because it is more susceptible to injury that can result in an open wound 
7. The burnt skin becomes tight over time and may require incisions to release the skin 

    I have had several skin grafts in order to provide me with a better lifestyle and enable me to operate physically. I wish people would just let us be and understand our skin has nothing to do with having a disability. We are just as capable as anyone else to function normally and achieve success. Our brains were not damaged internally; therefore, we have the capability to learn and be successful in whatever we endeavor. 

    If you want to be helpful, just treat us like normal people even though we look completely different from the world. So, that's pretty much it in a bottle. Burn survivors are cool people and they know not to be judgmental- hence everyone else is judging us. 

     Till next time, 

Xoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Ana :)

Surprise!!!               

Urban Geography

Oh to the Em to the Gee!!! It's so beautiful, truly a master piece via my digital skills. Major Lol.

    Anyways, I want to start introducing new topics of discussion starting today. I am an educated individual and I want to share my paid knowledge to you for free. To be honest I still owe $20,000.00 on that knowledge but heeeyyy. Major Lol. Uncle Sam can and will wait to get paid. 

    Urban geography is dear to my aorta and it is an important topic of discussion people should be familiarized with in general. People question a lot of the things happening in our world, yet, they do not understand the reasoning behind these events taking place. Let's define the terminology one step at a time: geography is the science based genre that divides into physical and human geography. Human geography deals with the interaction of nature with people, so for instance everything that a person may need from nature is a type of human geographical interaction. Physical geography focuses on the sciences of weather, earth's physical structure, and any science that describes the globe. 

    Underneath human geography is a sub-subject known as urban geography. This subdivision concentrates on the city or small town living for the residents of that area. Urban geographer also brake apart into other categories such as urban planner (the one I would like to pursue). Urban planners are responsible for selecting an area of interest and working to ensure their arena is met with adequate services. I want to focus on the community development aspect of becoming an urban planner. 

   As a low-income resident of over 28 years of age, I have the personal knowledge to understand and know what is required and what will make community development a success. There is no greater need than that of a impoverished community. Everything is affected by the lack of physical resources most people have taken for granted. For example, I struggled to become an even more academically excelling student due to lack of these specific resources. 

     To elaborate on that point, my family could never really afford to pay for cable or internet services. I had my 1st pre-paid mobile phone at age 19 in my senior year of high school. It was a flip-phone with no camera and the card would allow only for 1,000 texts including the texts I received. As a direct result, when I had to complete the academic research papers my teachers demanded of myself: I was left without the basic resources. I had to skip breakfast just so I could come into the library first thing in the morning at school to print out the research information to take home and read. Where I lived the public library was not within a walking distance, and this made it more difficult to access the one free resource available to everyone. 

    Looking back on it, I know I would have been an excellent candidate for Valedictorian: had I been given the resources all other students in my honors and AP courses had access to on a daily basis. I was eager to excel and perform my best but based on my low-income status I was limited to how well I could perform. I had the capacity to learn and the right attitude/discipline while I attended my grade schooling years; however, the lack of resources kept me from achieving even more successes. 

     Urban planners working in the community development sector not only are able to improve the physical layout of the city - they can go beyond that aesthetics and bring real change to the way of life. This will affect crime, health, economics, and overall atmosphere. I want to contribute to this change in so many ways, I am excited to begin the projects that have been cooking for so long in my mind. 

    TO be continued...




Xooxoxoxoxoxo,



ANA :)



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A-Holes

    Shut up!!! Is what I would like to tell certain people that annoy me and are being a-holes. They think and make an assumption that I am a nice person and will put up with just anything. HELL NO!!!!!! 

      I am nice but believe me when I say I know how to be nasty too. I will not take any more BS from anybody. I deserve to be valued and respected and there is nothing in this world that is going to change that standard. I will be made clear as in heard okay!!!! So, apart from the fun attention grabber. I am please to announce I have been working again and I love it. I am responsible for the sanitation of the patients room and the hospital. I am blessed with the opportunity to interact with the patients on a daily basis. They make me feel welcomed and I serve them to the best of my ability. 

    We (my employment and I) are the best match made to man-kind. I love being surrounded with people who care about health and well-being of other individuals. As a former patient myself, I feel empowered to let them know I was on their side and I know exactly how it feels to be a patient with uncertainty and despair. Stay calm though- because there is light at the end of the tunnel (like me) in which you can overcome adversities and live a full life. 

    I am working my way to becoming a spiritual ambassador and I am extremely excited to continue making a difference in the lives of patients and everyone I come in contact with as well. Please, feel free to contact me at any point and time if you have questions or comments about my blogs. I would be so grateful to receive feedback. 

XXOXOXOOXOXOXo,


ANA :)

LeBron Gone

   Heeeeyyyy!!! Say hello to the best team in the league - my boys the Golden State Warriors aka NBA 2018 Champions. If you haven't already noticed I love basketball and I am a baller myself. I have been viewing the NBA Finals since I was 12 years old and I have never missed a Finals series. My favorite teams are as follows: 

1. LA Lakers
2. SAN ANTONIO Spurs 
3. MIAMI Heat
4. GOLDEN STATE Warriors 

       My beloved mommy also loves basketball and we watch the games together all the time. She stayed up till 3 or 4 am when the Olympics was going on in China in 2008 or 2010, because USA basketball team was going for gold versus Spain. I tried to stay up but I was too tired and sleepy - I was rooting for Spain anyways (they lost and obtained Silver metals). 

      I have purchased 5 basketballs in my lifetime. I call it my baby - it is so pretty and beautiful ball. I recently bought a charm designed in a - you know it - basketball !!!!  It is a gold basketball charm and I wear it 24/7, to the shower and to bed. I am thinking about getting me a little tat on my hip with the NBA logo and with the calligraphy saying Baller baby. I still want to purchase a basketball jersey and some basketball shorts and maybe some Jordans too.  

       I love shooting hoops with my eye candy Nathan, because he takes off his shirt and the beaming sun makes his sexy body and six pack glisten too. He is so damn good looking and he actually helps me improve my shots. I have been friends with him for over 5 years and I think I have a huge crush on him - well I like like like him a lot. He already told me he doesn't like me that way and he could never be with someone who looks like me. This broke my heart and will forever hurt deeply; yet, I still keep loving him and stayed friends with him because I want to be his best friend. 

       He is a great baller, but nothing in comparison to my ex skills. He is amazing and I wish he could join the NBA but  his height prohibits him from doing so. I will forever appreciate the time we spent together and I wish him the very best. So, let me shut up and wrap it up before I loose your attention. 

     Till next time please feel free to check out my small business and my Page!!!!

Must be the Money

         CHA CHING I know money makes the world go round. I have had some cha ching in the past, but no where close to being sufficiently stocked with money. I took out 6 credit cards because I wasn't working and needed certain things. Yes, it makes no sense, but I have a good credit score so why not utilize it when I needed it the most. People will judge me for being irresponsible and ambitious- I see it as being resourceful and self-sufficient. I pay my monthly payments with plasma donations and other things I've sold at the pawn shop. 

     Everybody can judge me for whatever reason they want to; however, they're not in my place facing my needs. Yes, I have also asked a few of my friends to lend me some money too. I will repay each and everyone of them with interest because I am a woman of my word as well. Money is essential in this kind of world- just don't let it control you. Be smart about those Benjamins and remember to save when it is possible. Don't be stubborn and take the budget list accordingly. 

       I want to be successful, but there are certain things I will never do in order to get there. I don't believe and agree with lottery playing. It may be easy money - it is also cursed money. I want to feel the satisfaction of knowing everything I have in my bank account came from my hard work. I am not looking for hand-me-downs nor will I accept pitiful donations. If you want to enable me by donating to my gofundme account then that's acceptable. Please feel free to critic my work. Feedback is always encouraged and welcomed. 

      I have a good grip on money, but I will become profitable one day. Don't let my current loans and debt fool you. My family is business savvy and I have what it takes to make it to the very top. Best believe me or defeat me. Have a wonderful Tuesday day!!! 

    Till next time ya bestie blogger Ana !!!!


Xooxoxoxoxo, 

Ana :) 

   

Suicidal

   Life is precious! No one knows with exact certainty when they will inhale their last breath. When it will be the last time that they come across their loved ones. When it will be the last time they get laid or laid off. So many last times, yet, none can compare to a last goodbye. I have been fortunate thus far to never have been through a last goodbye. I hope I never have to experience one any time soon. I am an emotional person in general, so thinking of losing someone I love forever is gut-wrenching. 

    I am a miracle baby and to think I would want to deprive  myself of my own life - was just a thought I never saw plausible. Years later, I found myself in that situation twice within 4 years. It stemmed from episodes of severe depression. Being depressed is bad enough, now double that intensity and make it severe for over four consecutive months. They came alongside insomnia and loss of appetite, no desire for hygiene maintenance, constant raging negative/diabolical thoughts and complete isolation from the world (including friends and family). 

    I began to think the depression would never end. I was mentally exhausted to the point where I wanted to shut down my brain. The constant reminders of my past failures and distress increased my anxiety. I could not let five minutes pass by without having thought of more than 10 things in a row. I felt so much guilt and remorse for my life choices - this made me feel like the worst person in the world. I initiated my suicidal behavior by thinking of ways by which I could commit suicide. I would look down at my wrist and imagine myself cutting it with a scissor or a knife. I would also look at my ankles as well. I tried to cover up my face with a pillow and hold it there without me breathing once. When I stood on the second floor, I would look over the railing out in the balcony and would repeat over and over in my head, "just do it and get it over with now, just jump over." 

     I verbally repeated several times, " I quit, I can't do it anymore, no more." Nothing could make me feel better: not the medication, not the company, no gifts, no visits, and really nothing made it better. It was genuinely only by GOD's infinite mercy and grace that allowed me to survive and come out on the other side. So, please feel free to ask questions and comment your feedback. Life is so beautiful, but no one should live it in depression and suicidal thoughts. Please seek help and remember: to every life's problem there is an alternative solution that does not involve killing yourself. Whether or not you believe in God, trust me that killing yourself doesn't solve anything but condemns your soul to eternal hell. 

      Thank you for taking the time to read my post. Hope to inspire one person at a time. Remember you are important to God and you have a purpose in life - regardless of your situation at this time. 


Xoxoxoxoxoxo,

Ana :)

       

Born to Porn?

    Oh baby come get some... harder, harder, harder ahhhh ohhhh mmmmm. Are you serious right now? Yes, I am being serious people. So many people ignore the subject, because it's too X-rated. Listen it's 2018 not 1920- let's be real with the issues at hand. So, for starters lets define porn: a video displaying body parts going in and out of other body parts. Sometimes they use roles and equipment, and they always exaggerate the intensity of the pleasure. 

    Is porn legal? Well, they have playboy so I assume to a certain extent: yes it is. Should kids or teens be exposed or have access to porn? Absolutely not!!!!! They barely know how to wipe their ass to be trying to stick something up there. It is a degrading activity to be sharing such an intimate act to the whole wide world. Yes, it gets someone hard/wet but the end game is you are not edifying yourself. Why make making love into something so despicable that it becomes an addiction.

     Love is suppose to be shown in many different ways, but making love to the love of your life should be a special moment. Why watch people having sex when you should be having sex with your spouse. Yes, I've been there and done that unfortunately. My eyes saw porn at age eleven - not by choice but by being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

       After that one time it took years before my eyes were once more corrupted. I became sexually active at age 24 so, I obviously ended up getting involved in that realm. I watched to learn what the hell I was suppose to be doing, yet, that didn't help me at all. Overall, porn is not a choice you should advocate for or get involved with it at all. You were not born to porn!!

       Well, there you have it. One more interesting and opinionated blog about life's issues. Don't be shy about talking about your problems. Always seek help and never give up to make yourself a better person -no matter what your past has been. There is always opportunity to make something successful out of yourself. Believe in your goals and smile because God loves you!!!!

        Xoxoxoxoxooxoxo,

         Ana :)

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My Drugs

  Hello people of this social media platform!!!! I have been gifted with words; plenty of words that make beautiful, fun, and creative sentences that later become awesome paragraphs. I am using this large cool font to advocate for those who might be visually impaired like myself because I ware glasses. 

   Now, let's get high!!! Wait what??? Girl you is crazy. Nah, I meant let's get high as in into the drug zone. I have been on 99.9% of legal drugs since I was born into this cruel world. When my accident happened my body was placed under induce comma; which is a procedure they use with specific medication to keep your brain asleep. Before every surgery and after the procedure I was given medicine to operate on me and medicine to help with the pain of being cut open.

    I was then prescribed antibiotics for about two weeks after the release of the hospital and for any pain. I avoid taking medicine in general, because I have been pumped with medicine left and right since I was only three years old. I have taken Midol, Tylenol, Advil, and Pepto-Bismol. I did take a few puffs from the mary-jane , but it was a waste of time because I was already tipsy. I am not proud of that limited usage but it happened - mainly under peer-pressure. 

    Apart from that I have also been under anti-depressants and sleeping pills over the counter and then the real hard-shit too. I have survived two severe episodes of depression and it was not cool to be on so many medications. The Lord is faithful and I have been over 75 days Seroquel free and I sleep like a good baby again. People take sleeping for granted, but when your body physically can't sleep on it's own it is hell. I have been there twice and I hope to never ever see a third time episode. My natural melatonin is the best kind of sleep I could ever ask for in life.

     So, there you have it. My drugs in a lifetime usage. I hope you learned new concepts and information on drugs. Please stay safe out there and don't experiment, and avoid being under any kind of peer-pressure. Drugs are not good for your body regardless of if they are legal or not.

     Love to hear back from my readers and bloggers!!!!

xoxoxoxoxo,

-Ana :)

Come get something for Free  !!!!! It's called motivation !!!! 

Naughty or Haughty

   

    Do you wanna come out and play? Umh... what are you talking about I am a grown woman- I don't have time for games boy. 

 

   Silly pudding right? Yes, of course it is, but I got your attention and that is what counts. My titles are usually creative for the most part, and I want to keep it that way. I have always been a good student/peer throughout my schooling. However, there comes a time in everyone's life where you get a little loose. 

 

    Online dating - not recommended- brought out of me the most X-rated version of myself I didn't know existed within me. I will always regret the time and effort I placed during these months, because I gained nothing and lost so many precious moments of my life. One-night stands are not glamorous neither are one-day stands in a vehicle. 

 

     I have been more than just naughty and it wasn't worth it. I have been called a haughty and it got me into trouble that just gave me double the heartbreak. Please keep yourself out of the naughty list and be nice. No one ever made a friend over being a bad ass; let's be real - being bad is fun until you get caught being naughty. 

 

    So if you have a choice between being naughty or a haughty - just be you and let the rest be left alone. Don't make your life so complicated with all these diverse social norms being pushed and promoted by society. Remember in the end they are not worth the time and it has real life consequences for a lifetime that cannot be undone by blocking; un-liking; un-following; or deleting. 

 

    Learn to love yourself first and foremost above everyone else. Be smart about your choices in partner interactions: ladies - don't give away free samples, guys- don't show your Popsicle. Sex and pleasure can always be found and obtained within minutes, but true love and admiration takes a lifetime to endure and experience - don't waste that precious time. 

Xoxoxoxoxo,

 

- Ana :) 

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