Day Dreaming #amilikey

 

    One of my all time favorite activities to do is daydream. I know it's not exactly healthy because it heightens the expectations of what is real and what is not. I also resort to it as a coping mechanism to the current situations I may be dealing with in my life. I know that in due season what is meant for me  and my life will come to pass but it is hard at times to wait for them to come. 

    I wanted to discuss it because right now I have one or actually two events coming up. As an amateur runner I do participate in a few races throughout the year. In each and every event, I always have this hope that maybe just maybe I might meet someone new that will bring something new into my life. Obviously the first thing I think about is will my future partner perhaps be there and will this be the means by which our love story begins. I know how naïve and hopeful that sounds for something that is not at all guaranteed or probable for me. In the past races, no one has ever even spoken a single word to me, so why would a good-looking man ever approach me and be interested in getting to know me. Clearly, these events are all against me in terms of the social group aspect of being one of the chosen females to approach. Super athletic and pretty girls are out there showing off their perfect bubble butts and long legs; meanwhile I am just showing my scars and little kids size shoes. Also, not to be so critical but the majority of the men out there are either gay and total stuck-up jocks that care more about their appearance than anything else surrounding them. 

    I am excited because one of the events is specifically geared towards Latinos and I've never participated in a specific genre race before so that will be new and different for me. I hope at the very least that considering that these are my people we will have more things in common to bond over and perhaps I might actually make a pen pal. Hopefully I will experience some of that warmth I've been missing out on since I am no longer in Colombia and in large Latino gatherings. But back to the daydreaming part, I do create a whole scenario of who I might meet at these events and how they will be so fond of me and keep in touch. I imagine them falling in love with me and becoming my best friends (which I have none and I have been friendless for quite some time). To be even more honest that is why I talk so much when I am at work because I have no one to talk to in real life other than my immediate family (and even that is not enough because there are certain things they can't relate to me on). When I thought I had real friends, they often criticized my knowledge and never appreciated me for me. It was nice having someone to talk to but in retrospect, they never fulfilled that need I had to relate to someone going through my same hardships and experiences. More than anything I hope I get to see nice people and have a healthy good run in each of the events. 

    My last little two cents is I need to post more blogs because I am so far away from my 50 posts goal for this year. I only have I think it was 14 blogs posted this year and we are way past the mid-year mark; which means I am definitely so far behind. I have gotten better in terms of not overdoing the daydreaming, but it is like that bad habit you try to break and it is very enticing and addictive. It requires very little effort and I can daydream anywhere- mainly when I am by myself or in a quite environment. It also helps pass the time and it really gets me emotional to where I smile and like enter a zoned out face as if I was watching an actual movie. I pray the people that are meant to be in my life will arrive sooner than later, and I won't have to resort to daydreaming about having a social life anymore but I will actually get to live it out. 

    Alright, thank you for tuning in one more time to this humble blog. As always, " You are not a mistake, because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes." Make sure you like, share, subscribe, and leave a comment - even if it's to criticize my writing - anything at this point would be nice to be acknowledged for once!!!

Love, 

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Ana :)

  

Bad Jefes #amilikey

 

Hello mi gente!!! So as I browse the LinkedIn page I read a lot of posts regarding what makes a good boss and everything to do with leadership. 

I’m thankful 🥹 I haven’t had too many bosses in my lifetime because I started my adventure in the workplace until I was 27. It hurts me to know I literally had to wait that long to be acknowledged as a potential and reliable employee. Now, with that in mind the only good thing is I never had to start working at a fast food restaurant or a retail store like 99% of the teenage population. 

Let me see I’ve had an estimate of 7 different bosses not including the labor pools which constantly rotated and obviously were a daily assignment. Out of those 7 primary bosses in part time and full time jobs only two were just 😫😫😫🙄🙄🙄🫤🫤🫤 bad. The first one ironically was my first bad encounter. She was younger than me at the time, and thought I couldn’t take orders because the age difference to which I specifically told her and I quote, “ If a two year old was in charge of the activity I would have no problem listening to them.” What made her a bad boss was her lack of trust in all her employees (3) to do as she asked with just one simple request. She had to monitor the progress every 5 minutes and she had to imply that there was only one way to get things done and that was her way. This bad boss literally had a written process for every little task like someone wasn’t coherent. The general concept of writing out step by step instructions in getting something done is not wrong, but when you have to step by step how to print labels and have a freaking checklist to do what was suppose to be a “small cleaning” —- damn that’s annoying!!!! 

She was a horrible boss, because she had incoherent expectations of what my tasks were as a “administrative assistant” (which was just a fancy title for office cleaning lady/making coffee, shred, copy, stamp, mail) and one day she actually got mad at me for now washing her damn coffee cup that she kept at her cubicle and not at the sink. So she really thought that after doing the daily cleaning and washing the dishes at the sink that I too would go around picking them up. I did text her once at the very beginning of me working there she was the best but it was a total lie and I totally kissed her butt. I didn’t know what to text back because that was another annoying thing that she constantly texted me asking me dumb questions and constant monitoring before she got to work, after she left, after I left and it was super aggravating. 

The straw that broke the camel’s back was actually the lack of respect they had for me there altogether. It was a small mom and pop small business, but they discriminated against me because I didn’t have my own MOT and never offered me full-time even though clearly I needed in order to get my MOT. MOT stands for mode of transportation it’s just a fancy way of saying my own car. Once they transferred to a new location, the original “small cleaning” turned into almost 2 hours every day plus a whole 4 hours on Wednesdays and I was feed up with the expectation that I had to complete the cleaning and the office tasks within a 5 to 6 hour shift. I worked for them for four consecutive months and what did I get in return from them: nothing. I was a professional already with a bachelors degree from a real university and they treated me like a coffee and donut cart vendor. They never cared to ask for my input on how to improve things and participate on the more meaningful aspects of the job. The only good thing that came of it was starting my resume timeline. 

The second horrible boss I had truly takes the cake. She number one did not deserve or earn her position at the clinic I was working. She only was placed there because she had a friend in the company who basically put her there. She never met the basic standards for healthcare in regards to being aware and prepared for being in healthcare. I had my medical office administration certificate when I applied and I also had experience working in healthcare as a volunteer and in general. This lady didn’t even know the difference between Medicaid and Medicare. She was a micromanaging freak to say the least. Literally every 5 to minutes she was giving dumb orders that were already implied. I thank the Lord I’m not blind and my peripheral vision is intact. Every time a patient was being discharged and approaches the front desk, I know that they need their discharge papers and I can hear the printer going off. And even then, she still had the audacity just to annoy me and give orders, “ Can you grab the papers off the printer and give them to the patient.” I am aware and you don’t have to say every single time. That is like telling me “make sure you close the door when you use the bathroom” — like it’s an obvious self explanatory thing that doesn’t need to be mentioned!!! 

I could not stand her way of approaching me with tasks and insinuating that the poor customer service rating were my fault. When clearly it was already a poor establishment lacking everything. She was so annoying with her loud mouth and random screams. Truth be told, if she hadn’t resigned to go back to her industry I was on the verge of quitting myself. She made being at work unbearable and frustrating. She acted like she knew so much about management because she had worked for over 20 years at a toy store as a manager. How in the world do you compare managing a toy store with something as delicate and complex as a medical health facility. As soon as she left, we all had a sense of relief and our scores were the highest they’ve ever been and it wasn’t because of her and what she did. I pray for the current employees under her management because I already know what they’re dealing with. No one is perfect, but certain people like her could really reevaluate her way of managing and constantly belittling people with her smart ass remarks. She always prioritize her needs and wants over anyone else: like making me come in for 3 stupid hours on a day I had already requested my 5 hours of PTO which technically hadn’t been updated just so she could go get her damn nails done. It was my family members surgery and had it not been schedule in the afternoon I definitely would have not made it in. She literally threatened me to write me up if I didn’t come in because allegedly I didn’t have enough hours to cover my whole shift. She did write me up two others times for bogus claims that I needed to improve customer service because one angry customer said something even though they never mentioned my name or described anything out of the ordinary. I truly deserve a price for enduring so much at that clinic for two years in a row. 

Anyways I just wanted to share my bad bosses and reiterate that the best kind of leadership is one where trust is given from the boss to his or her employees without questioning their capabilities to perform the job (because why hired them if you doubt they could do anything right). When you are a leader, you lead with example of being kind, prompt, and respectful to everyone’s situation. A leader is someone who aids others to be successful and not in competition to make them feel less than yourself. As always don’t forget “You are not a mistake because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes.” Thank you for reading come share, comment, like!!! 

Love, 

Xoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Ana :) 

Summer Updates #Amilikey

 

    So my people I’ve been doing really good overall!!! I as always wish more people viewed my content on this blog, but for various reasons I know that audience is dormant for now. I am currently eagerly waiting for my shift change to come to pass at work. When I first signed on, I had no idea becoming a full time night owl would harm my health the way it has thus far. And before you make the wrong assumptions, let me just pin point what I am referring to: my glucose level is too high or on the incline. I had my annual physical and my A1C is at a 6.0 which is pre-diabetic range. My PCP gave me an ultimatum of either starting meds or improving my A1C in four months with diet and exercise. I said absolutely not going to take meds for something I can improve and get under control. I do admit I love food and excess portions of it obviously does harm to anyone, but eating at night when you’re suppose to be sleeping has had an impact on my glucose for sure. 

   I also miss enjoying the morning sunrise and having my morning routine to do my training and whatever else my precious heart desires. I want to be able to not miss what is happening during daylight hours within my family and in general. So I am just waiting with all my heart to get release from this schedule and onto a normal schedule. Apart from playing the waiting game of life, I just thought I’d use updates as a general topic to blog about for this post. I signed up for another run this year, which is really exciting because I thought I was done for this year at least. I didn’t know of any other run happening that I’d like to be a part of because obviously there are runs going on all the time. I just have a very nice tuned selection for when it comes to participating in races. I have to agree with the cause and enjoy supporting the group holding the event. I am going to make a three day weekend out of it, so that’s super exciting as well. Unfortunately, I already know I’m not meeting my Prince Charming at this event. I won’t make any new connections or meet anyone I can get excited about at all. I already know how it’s going to go down. People will stare and gaze for long periods of time out of amazement that someone with so many scars on her skin could attempt a race this long (5 miles). They will barely say hi or nod and that will be it. Maybe, just maybe someone will briefly chat me up out of the “I feel so bad for her” sentiment and that’s it. I wish I could say, “I am going to run with my family or friends.” I wish I had someone to share the experience with, but no one will be there with me as per usual and no one will be there cheering me on as I cross the finish line. The downside about these social events, but at least I will be thrilled to advance my ultimate goal to prepare for that once in a lifetime marathon. I will also be so happy to have completed a new challenge and successfully finished the race without stopping or walking — just slow running or jogging. 

      On a more semi lighter note, as I scrolled through my past blogs — I thought it would be nice to go on a second coffee date with someone new. Unfortunately, the reality of that happening is a 100% negative, because I’d be doing myself a disfavor for seeking something that always goes wrong. No matter what kind of date I’d sign up to go on, the outcome would always be the same due to my circumstances. It makes sense, and it hurts but I can’t deny it to understand their point of view. If I don’t fit the basic criteria, then what is the point in investing their time to build something I’m not prepared for. Obviously, there is also that hopeful view that perhaps it wouldn’t kill them to be part of the help I’ve always wanted to get me to the place where I am eligible and ready for solid foundation. Well, men don’t want to be a part of the upbringing or assistance in getting to that point. I wouldn’t mind helping someone if I had the resources to get them there, but of course I am a different class of person. I would help anyone no matter who they were and what they have done. I understand that awful feeling of being left behind and not included in so many aspects — even when it doesn’t relate to dating and a romantic relationship I am still going to help. So my point of reference is that no matter how much I’d love to enjoy another coffee date, the person would just be disappointed and dissatisfied with all my lack of resources. My personality wouldn’t make them feel better and they would just look down on me like everyone has in the past. I also just want the experience of going on another date so I can blog about it. Major Lol. 

Alright, well I think I’ve given you micro audience enough updates for now. As always, “ You are not a mistake, because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes.” Allow yourself to open your heart and mind to Jesus Christ and begin to experience change in your life!!! 

Thank you for reading my humble blog and stay tuned for more down the road. Feel free to like, share, subscribe, and leave a comment!!! 

Xoxoxoxo, 

Ana 

Wordpress move? #amilikey

 

 

Greetings my beautiful and beloved bloggers!! I want to thank you for your generous support throughout the years. I have been debating starting my blogging on a new platform and just leaving this one active for the remainder of the time. I have worked really hard to gain a new audience on this google blogspot website, but I haven’t had much progress. Perhaps, in the new domain of WordPress, I can reach a broader spectrum of people worldwide. I am also enjoying my new refurbished laptop I purchased a few weeks back and that has also motivated me to post more blogs.  

I have been a writer since an early age back in elementary school, when I would write in my personal diary almost daily. I enjoy writing because it allows me to speak my mind without anyone cutting me off or rebuttal given onto me. Now, as a grown adult I have discovered that writing reaches many people in need of hearing a motivating voice. Trials and tribulations have made me a stronger person and have enabled me to help others along the way. I do not presume to know it all and be miss perfect; however, I can be a witness to the overcoming of hurdles most wouldn’t want to endure to begin with at all. I just saw a very cool video on LinkedIn that highlighted the importance of going through the rough patches in life: when we go through life in a monotonous route, we take longer to reach of destination versus going in an upward and downward motion we arrive there a lot faster than in a linear setting. People see me smile all the time, and it is a genuine smile, but that smile was gained by paying a price [enduring hardships no one will ever be able to relate to exactly how I lived it].  

I encourage each one to reach out for help no matter the small struggle or doubt you may be facing today. The only way to make it out of hard times is to utilize all the aids available to you. I know teachers and employers always say, “There is no such thing as a dumb question” and I say, “There is no trouble worth not talking about it or seeking help for it.” So be encouraged today and remember, “You are not a mistake because God is perfect, and He cannot make mistakes!” As always make sure you like, share, subscribe and leave a comment below!! Come follow my Instagram for more exclusive content.   

 

 

Xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxo,  

 

Love,  

 

Ana 😊    

Youth Reunion #amilikey

 

Hi everyone!!!!! So today well now technically yesterday was a very special day for me. I have been wanting to see my youth group from my early teen years and obviously could have never imagined it the way it happened. Although it was only a few people and not the whole group, it was still very nice and getting to catch up after all these years was very heart-warming. Our beloved pastor which we grew up, he finally finished his race with endurance and we came together at his funeral. 

     The majority of the people gathered there were his family members, but it is these same people I recall like family to me. I hadn’t seen them in years and to see them all grown up from when they were just kids is remarkable. Most of them are married and with kids of their very own now. Embracing someone you’ve known most of your life and have so many fawned memories with is just so special. Hopefully 🤞 this gathering can serve for a greater purpose of reuniting us and even reunited them as a large family too. It’s crazy to think that once a upon a time you didn’t think much about them, because people grow up and make a life of their own and here you are seeing them again and falling in love with that agape love you have always known. One person in particular really left an impression on me— he definitely looked so different than the memory I had of him but in a good way. To discover he has done so well for himself is also so good to hear and being able to talk to him in that loving manner was just so nice. We are a few years in separation and I never would have expected him to be so open to a conversation and to embrace the moment. Chatting with him was definitely worth the coming in early for the memorial service. I hope I get the opportunity to see him and his family again. Perhaps I’ll be invited to his wedding or invited to hangout in a group setting to keep bonding in fellowship. 

     I believe it would be super epic to have a total youth reunion with the rest of the people I grew up with in church. They were a huge part of my life and it would be a beautiful thing and a blessing to be able to come together again after all these years. I know we all have our differences and separate lives, but we share something special in common and we should embrace that unique bond that binds us all. I was thinking perhaps a weekend event where we rented a large airB&B and hired a small team of childcare workers to also include the family’s children. I know that sounds too expensive and exaggerating, but in order to have the youth that are now all adults be able to share and bond we need that no kids zone time. I’d obviously come up with a great hour by hour itinerary to ensure we make the most of the 3 days. I’d plan fun/creative activities to do and make sure everyone felt comfortable and included!!! It is possible and with appropriate planning/budgeting this youth reunion can become a reality. I pray 🤲 this blog comes forth a reality in the near future and that those who need to be reminded of God’s love can be reached through this post. As always, “ You are not a mistake, because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes.” Remember to live with passion and love people in your life while they are still here. Thank you for your support and remember you can always subscribe, share, like and comment too!!!! 

Love, 

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo,  

Ana 🥹 

Cartagena, Colombia in 2024 #Amilikey

     

    Wow I did it!!!! So this is super special for me in every sense of the word. I never imagined it would be possible given where I am financially and in my personal journey. I have yet to start my many projects and goals, so to add this in the middle of those ongoing things was a lot for me to take on, but I did it. It was also bitter sweet given that I traveled alone and my precious mom was robbed of reuniting with her first born child. I have been hesitating from going to Colombia for that same reason that I didn't want my mom to feel bad for not having the opportunity to visit and see her daughter of over 23 years of separation. I also felt bad my brother also could not fly either and I would only be seeing my sister and not the rest of my family. For those that have been following my journey, you guys know well I am not scared of anything - because God's perfect love cast out fear!!! However, we are called to be smart about are decisions and with that in mind I wanted to avoid my father at all costs. He is known for being a criminal and wanting to seek entire into the US at all costs and one of those options would be to falsify documents with original ones (mine). So I was absolutely not taking that chance, he would immediately inquire about letting him see my US passport and attempt to replicate the document or whatever. 

    I know this sounds bizarre, but when you know the person and what they are capable of doing then you are on red alert. I do not trust my own biological father with a penny. He has lied to me his whole life and he was neglected me as a daughter and never cared for my genuine well-being. He always put his interest before my actual needs, and that is exactly how he was revoked VISA in the first place- by overstaying his VISA for over two years just to make money (money that I barely ever received as parental support). My father is an alcoholic from childhood and he has his own trauma from an abusive father as well, but he choose to follow in his footsteps instead of breaking free from that type of toxic parenting or lack of parenting. Overall, I didn't feel comfortable being in his presence with his history and I knew that would also make it harder on my mom's peace and sanity to know I was in harms way. My sister and I choose to meet each other far away from our home town and reunite in the beautiful city of Cartagena. At first, I wanted to visit a place where I could see the river and ocean view too, but unfortunately that made it much harder to select a location with both options. The time frame and budget was also limited so we had to settle for one city and a few tours. 

    I am so happy I was brave enough to make this trip happen despite the limited resources. I took out a small loan to cover the final expenses - yes it is true, but with my current job I am able to repay back that small loan with installments that fit my budget. I thank the Lord for my new job schedule that also made this trip possible, I only had to take two days of PDO versus 7 if I had the basic Monday thru Friday schedule I used to have. I landed in Colombia at night and it was also hot and humid, but the night lights and atmosphere of my people was so heart-warming. I truly miss being around my people my Colombians for sure for sure. They are so respectful, loving, courteous, and polite that it was the best part of being there the whole time. I was able to greet everyone with a smile and a "good morning" that radiated happiness and joy without having to beg them to speak to me -- it was an automatic response everywhere I went. I met two sweet ladies that I kept as pen pals and they were also so welcoming and friendly. I could write one page summarizing each of the seven days I was there, but that would be like a mini book. I will only mention the highlights for this blog. 

    I took two different tours with my sister and one solo tour for the last one. As expected, sibling rivalry was alive and present, unfortunately -- me and my sister are complete opposites when it comes to character personality. We both have known this since we were kids. I am the gentle, sweetheart, with a bubbly attitude all the time and she is aggressive, rough, with a negative attitude 80% of the time. So I expected to tension to build up and friction to escalate but not to the point where being apart was the only way to simmer the situation. We had an hour long confrontation talking about everything that bothered me and how she just didn't see things the way they really are versus how she sees them. We both cried out of anger, frustration and disappointment, but after two days we and mainly she gathered herself to be able to spend the last day in peace. I love my sister dearly, but I wasn't going to let her bully me into her dynamics and her perspective of how I should do things. We are both grown 30 year old woman who have the right to decide how we live our life. I did my very best to avoid confrontation over stupid things and she accused me of being a coward for avoiding confrontation, but I was being smarter by deliberately avoiding arguing over dumb shit like not putting the wet towel over the door like I wanted to versus outside in the balcony like she instructed me to do. I kept my mouth shut because I know what was in my best interest and if putting up with her control freak and micro-managing way the only way to enjoy my vacation then so be it. 

    In the moments where she was calm, cool, and collective -- we did make fun memories and shared beautiful sights that will fuel me for a lifetime. I did learn from her as well, and now more than ever I know what I will not tolerate in a partner, because being roommates with her for a week was an eye-opener for sure. I cannot stand having to constantly nag someone to wake up early if we have plans and a limited schedule to get things done. I never labeled myself as a morning person, but I really am an early morning bird. I woke up every day before she did even if I went to bed last. I enjoyed my morning reading the bible at the balcony with the beautiful ocean view and those beautiful sunrises. I love being organized and she wasn't as tidy as she claims to be and she hogged the TV control remote and never asked what I wanted to watch. The very first day we got there she didn't even ask which bed do you prefer and just picked the one next to the balcony immediately as if I was going to take it away. Again, I thought that was rude for not even asking and I didn't say anything, but was like okay that's fine I'll take the other one. Throughout the trip I shared all my clothes, and items I brought for the trip because she didn't bring a check-in bag so I obviously brought more things because I like to be prepared. So yeah, I learned a lot about what it is like living with someone within the same corridors. I had never spent more than a day or two with someone in the same room as me, so I am thankful for that part of the trip. 

    I do miss having a sister to bond with and share my life with, but only the Lord knows why we had to be separated all these years and will continue to live our lives far away from each other. I miss her and I hope the next opportunity we have will be a million times better and we will not reach those escalating moments of tension. I already know we need two separate rooms and I will handle my own currency and we will both have our own separate tours so that we do not annoy each other for being together 24/7. I enjoyed about 60 to 70% of all the foods I had been craving to taste again. I did almost 80% of all the activities I wanted to enjoy with my sister. She gets an A++ for selecting the 4 star hotel we stayed at because the customer service was excellent and the buffet breakfast was incredible truly remarkable. I loved that hotel and the pools and views were amazing. I highly recommend GHL Corales de Indias to everyone visiting Cartagena, Colombia!!!!! I love you Colombia and I know this Sunday we will beat Argentina 1-0 in the final Copa America for sure for sure!!!! Colombia wins Copa America 2024!!!!! 

Remember "You are not a mistake because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes" allow the Lord Jesus to change your life!!!

    Thank you so much for your support and keep following for more great content!!! I have amazing videos on my YouTube channel and pictures on Instagram all you have to do is search my hashtag #amilikey

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Love, Ana :) 

Failure eventually has to come #Amilikey

 

Yo yo what’s up my people? Nothing much I guess since I get so many messages and comments — not!! Well, I hate to admit it but I am still an emotional person and I was deep in my feelings after certain things happened, so I had no motivation to blog. I was so sure I wouldn’t fail this CNA certification because it seemed so simple and basic, and I got overconfident. I paid for a freaking 3 day training and thought that was good enough to prepare for this exam. Absolutely, not enough to cover all the clinical skills required to pass, the instructor claims thousands of people have passed, but that does not give her the credibility she thinks she has because one of two things happened: they either got the easiest skills she actually went over or they were smarter than me and did their own research and better prepared to make sure they didn’t fail by missing instruction on certain skills. I sure did leave her a review, because it’s not fair you think you paid for something to be fully accessed and then end up like what we have to do these tasks never performed in my training( not to mention we barely practiced the ones mentioned in the training). Once again, every time you try to save money and pay for a cheaper version of something — you get what you paid for and that was half the information. 

      So, I invested all that time and money only to come up one skill short of passing my clinical exam and that was devastating for my ego and my overall goals I had already projected. I am not saying it’s not my fault for not better preparing myself, but it definitely hurt deeply to work hard on something and to ultimately fail. I have not given up the project altogether, I just have to readjust and try again. I can’t say for sure when I will transition into being a nurse tech at my current hospital, but it will be part of my near future because I love taking care of the patients and being hands on. Apart from that deviation and delay in acquiring new certification to my resume, I also confronted something in my health that I knew about briefly, but hadn’t been emphasized with great concern. 

     I attended my PCP just the other day to review my annual blood work and he mentioned that I had two options. I could fix my diet or he would start me on meds to reduce my A1C levels to prevent me from becoming diabetic. I was definitely not going to opt for medication and I told him I would be working on my diet for sure. The part of this interaction that displeased me and hurt me was when he deliberately stated, “You might want to incorporate some type of exercise too, unless you have some kind of physical disability.” I was offended and responded, “I do exercise and I also run,” and he with a smug face said “Well clearly not enough.” I was like wow what an ass and what type of doctor encourages a patient by mocking them and questioning whether they are telling the truth based on their looks. He totally assumed I was just a lazy slob who clearly doesn’t do anything to take of herself and she clearly must not be able to exercise all because her skin texture has burn scar tissue. 

   I definitely won’t be following up my appointment with him, but I will check up with another doctor in four months to see that I did comply with proper dieting and exercise. It’s sad to think these are the types of professionals we have nowadays and it explains why people are hesitant to visit their doctors if that’s how they’re going to be treated with such poor manners. I understand you have to be firm about the serious implications that becoming diabetic convey, but there is a proper way to emphasize the importance without being insulting and disrespectful. He could have said, “That’s great that you have running as your prefer method of exercise, and now you might want to just increase its frequency to help you out.” Also, not assume am disabled because I have burn scars on my body. I hate having to constantly defend and explain to people I am not stupid or disabled at all. I have made many stupid decisions and have overworked myself physically trying to compensate for poor eating or time crunch. Yet, none of that labels me as dumb or disabled. Not to brag, but in comparison to the average Jane — I have accomplished more than they ever will and I can out perform them without any problem. 

     So, my point in all of this is that no matter how hard we try to avoid failure— it is inevitable and it has to be part of our growth. I learned yet again, you can never over prepare yourself and you can never rely on anyone else to get you ready for whatever you have to face. It is up to you to do the work and make sure you exhausted all your options to be ready. As much as people say, I am here for you and you can count on me — make sure you do your part above all. Accept the loss not like a bitter and sorry loser, but with a greater focus on not failing again and making sure the next time you get that beautiful W. None of this matters in the grand scope of life, but while we are here on earth let us be productive people who strive to make a difference in life. For those who know eternity is coming, it won’t matter how many failures or success you acquire in this lifetime, because eternity is not earned but rewarded by God’s grace. Remember that “You are not a mistake, because God is perfect and He does not make mistakes!” This life is hard enough as it is, so allow the Lord Jesus to be a part of it so you can withstand the failures that come your way and embrace them with the opportunity to learn. My blog may never reach the vast popularity of audience I’d like it to have but if one person can get something out of it then that’s all that matters — and maybe that one person is just me!! Major Lol. You have to be your biggest cheerleader because again no one is rooting for you. Alright, I said more than enough, again if you wouldn’t mind sharing, liking, subscribing or commenting I’d appreciate it!!!! 

Xoxoxoxoxoxoxo, 

Ana 😜☺️